Aussie Sausage Factory

Have a guess what this section is for? Yes that's right children, it's the place to post all your jokes and funny stuff.
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anonstarter
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Aussie Sausage Factory

Post by anonstarter »

One dark night in the small town of Warrigal Lake in the middle of the Grampians , Victoria, last week, a fire started inside the local sausage factory.
In a blink the building was engulfed in flames.
The alarm went out to all the fire departments for miles around.
When the first volunteer fire fighters appeared on the scene, the sausage company president rushed to the fire chief and said, 'All of our secret sausage recipes are in the vault in the centre of the plant. They have to be saved, so I will donate $5,000 to the fire company that brings them out and delivers them to me.'
But the roaring flames held the fire-fighters off.
Soon more fire departments had to be called in because the situation became desperate.
As the firemen arrived, the president shouted out that the offer to extricate the secret recipes was now $10,000 to the fire department that could save them.
Suddenly from up the road, a lone siren was heard as another fire truck came into sight.
It was the fire engine of the nearby Baringal Valley, volunteer fire department, composed mainly of Aboriginal fire-fighters over the age of 65.
To everyone's amazement, the little run-down fire engine, operated by these Aboriginal fire-fighters, shot straight past the fire engines parked outside the plant, and drove straight into the middle of the inferno.
Outside, the other firemen watched in amazement as the Aboriginal old timers jumped off and began to fight the fire as if they were fighting to save their own lives.
Within a short time, the Baringal Valley old timers had extinguished the fire and saved the secret recipes.
The grateful sausage company president joyfully announced that for such a superhuman accomplishment he was raising the reward to $20,000, and walked over to personally thank each of the brave elderly Aboriginal fire-fighters.
A TV news crew rushed in after capturing the event on film.
The 'on camera' reporter asked the Aboriginal fire chief, 'What are you going to do with all that money?'
'Well,' said Chief Billy Cokebottle, the 70-year-old fire chief, 'de furst ting we gonnna do is fix dem brakes on dat fukin' fire truck...'
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Re: Aussie Sausage Factory

Post by visfix »

Was it absolutely necessary to use an (incorrect) racial stereotype, when 'quoting' the Aboriginal fire chief?
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Re: Aussie Sausage Factory

Post by Liam »

many people use racial stereo types in jokes.
But if a joke is funny, and not hurtful, does it matter?
It was incorrect to use "de furst" and "dem" but I'm not sure how you'd write down an Aboriginal accent.

If we have to "police" jokes then why hasn't anyone mentioned all the Irish jokes that are on here?
I just find them funny. And I suppose, if you're white, it isn't racism. :?

As an aside,, Irish people tell "Kerry men" jokes, that imply all the people from Kerry are thick but there's nothing malicious in it.

p.s. Did you hear about the English woman who'd swum all the way across the Irish Sea before she realised a 26" Murphy was a television set?
The English are thick feckers :lol:

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Re: Aussie Sausage Factory

Post by boboking »

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Re: Aussie Sausage Factory

Post by visfix »

Liam wrote:many people use racial stereo types in jokes.
But if a joke is funny, and not hurtful, does it matter?
It was incorrect to use "de furst" and "dem" but I'm not sure how you'd write down an Aboriginal accent.

I agree, most jokes, throughout the world, use racial stereotypes, and I do not have a problem with this, but, why write it down in anything other than correctly spelt English, as the other characters were? It was totally unnecessary. The joke would have still been funny, as it is the mental image of the situation, rather than the ethnic backgrounds of the characters.
The use of 'de furst ting' and 'dem', is indicative of a racial stereotype used more than 30 years ago, and when used in connection with people of West Indian/Afro-Carribean descent, not Aboriginal.

I am white and have suffered racial abuse, but it is water off a ducks back, as I have the hide of an elephant. However, unfortunately, my two sons have also had to endure this, as they are mixed race. Therefore, such unnecessary, so called 'soft racism', from the 'I'm not racist, but...' crowd, I take offence at.
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Re: Aussie Sausage Factory

Post by anonstarter »

visfix wrote:Was it absolutely necessary to use an (incorrect) racial stereotype, when 'quoting' the Aboriginal fire chief?
A joke is something spoken, written, or done with humorous intention.[1] Jokes may have many different forms, e.g., a single word or a gesture (considered in a particular context), a question-answer, or a whole short story. The word "joke" has a number of synonyms, including wisecrack, gag, prank, quip, jape and jest.[1]

To achieve their end, jokes may employ irony, sarcasm, word play and other devices. Jokes may have a punch line, i.e. an ending to make it humorous.

This is how the 'joke' came to me and I thought it worthy of posting. Do a quick google and you'll see many variations of it - including the "(incorrect) racial stereotype".

Maybe 'Billy Cokebottle' was in such a rush when the bell went off he didn't have time to put his false nashers in? That he was so called because he'd marveled over a Coke bottle that he'd found in the middle of no-mans-land whilst on walkabout in the 1950's that had been thrown out of a aeroplane?

Take a glance at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joke" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
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Re: Aussie Sausage Factory

Post by Mr Angry »

Better to have edited it to make it applicable to this country i.e. £ instead of $ as well.

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Re: Aussie Sausage Factory

Post by anonstarter »

Mr Angry wrote:Better to have edited it to make it applicable to this country i.e. £ instead of $ as well.
:?:

Are you having a Turkish?
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Re: Aussie Sausage Factory

Post by visfix »

Defend it how you will; my second post still stands.
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Cornish Pasty Factory

Post by anonstarter »

One dark night in the small town of Redruth, Cornwall, last week, a fire started inside the local pasty factory.
In a blink the building was engulfed in flames.
The alarm went out to all the fire stations for miles around.
When the first of the last retained fire fighters appeared on the scene, the pasty company owner rushed to the fire officer and said, 'All of our secret pasty recipes are in the vault in the centre of the plant. They have to be saved, so I will donate £5,000 to anyone that brings them out and delivers them to me.'
But the new EU Health and safety rules held the fire-fighters back.
Soon more fire departments had to be called in because the situation became desperate.
As the fire fighters arrived, the Owner shouted out that the offer to extricate the secret recipes was now £10,000 to the fire department that could save them.
Suddenly from up the road, a lone siren was heard as another fire engine came into sight.
It was the fire engine of the nearby Four Lanes, volunteer fire department, composed mainly of retired Cornish Tin-miners over the age of 65.
To everyone's amazement, the little run-down fire engine, operated by these Cornish Miners, shot straight past the fire engines parked outside the plant, and drove straight into the middle of the inferno.
Outside, the other firemen watched in amazement as the old Cornish boys jumped off and began to fight the fire as if they were fighting to save their own lives.
Within a short time, the old miners had extinguished the fire and saved the secret recipes.
The grateful Pasty company owner joyfully announced that for such a superhuman accomplishment he was raising the reward to £20,000, and walked over to personally thank each of the brave elderly fire-fighters.
A TV news crew rushed in after capturing the event on film.
The 'on camera' reporter asked the retired fire chief, 'What are you going to do with all that money?'
'Well,' said Chief Denzel Trevorrow, the 70-year-old fire chief, 'thee furst fing we gonnna do, me 'ansome, is fix thee feckin' brakes on the feckin' fire engine...'
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